this is not a cry for help, it is a love song to myself

polluted emotions overcrowding thoughtsforgetting to breathe, believe, be, me..completely intuition subsiding, avoiding insides no time found to run into my own little world drown out the outside world, loud mouth background noise anxiety anxiety anxiety i've lost my mind the past few weeks popping pills, losing course forgetting to remember how it is to forget to remember circles circles circles a repetitive tone i hate myself for continuously trying with you i never want to try to be anything more with you it needs to be, fall casually, naturally yet impossible, instinctual, impractical yet ok, for today or tomorrow but never yesterday stuck in this rut of what to do or what to say how to act or when to speak if you knew me at all, you'd know my insides remain locked up locked up locked up locked up and i like it that way.. i feel comfortable and secure and safe that way. so scram so scram so scram scram scram!

all of these emotions overcrowding thoughts forgetting to breathe, believe, be, me.. completely pisces mind fluttering into dramtics of foreplay addicted to a moment the only moment things make sense i crave the darkness & a warm bed to drown my ears with sweet melodies recycling the paper with a pen emptying thoughts a hedonistic plot i need to be me, only me only me only me only me

p l e a s e

but if you have any love left but if you have any lust left but if you have any want left you'll ignore everything i say and play grown up for one beautiful day of a perfected reality. chills down my spine chills down my spine chills down my spine